Chuck Norris Jokes!

NASCAR Sprint Cup Series AAA Texas 500

In Case You Were Curious…About Chuck Norris (the myth)!

March 10, 2020

  • Bulletproof vests wear Chuck Norris for protection.
  • Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
  • Chuck Norris once broke a mirror over the head of a black cat while he was standing under a ladder on Friday the thirteenth. The next day he won the lottery.
  • Death once had a near-Chuck-Norris experience.
  • Chuck Norris can speak French…In Russian.
  • Chuck Norris doesn’t dial the wrong number, you pick up the wrong phone.
  • Chuck Norris can kill your imaginary friends.
  • When Chuck Norris gives someone they middle finger, he is telling them how many seconds they have left to live.
  • Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
  • Chuck Norris can hear sign language.
  • Pluto is no longer a planet because Chuck Norris says so.
  • When an unstoppable force meets an immovable object, Chuck Norris kills them both.
  • Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
  • Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay’s Potato Chip.

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